The Incredibly Dumb Story
by Fleur20
Summary: A funny story that is sure to have you laughing. It has some of your favorite anime, and movies mixed in with it. Many new characters will also be introduced.
1. How it all began

Non! Non!" yelled an old helpless man in the middle of the street as a vampire was attacking  
  
The vampire was running near the man but tripped over a small bicycle and landed headfirst in a dirty garbage can. The old man began to run but he was too late a group of vampires were right there in front of him. "Please, spare my life!" begged the man.  
  
"Ah, what's the point in asking us to spare your life if we're just going to kill you anyway. Don't you think that's a waste of vocals," said one of the vampires .  
  
"Well if you were just going to kill me any way why would it matter if I waste my vocals or not," said the old man.  
  
"Give us a moment to think about that," said the vampire and the others thinking.  
  
Two hours later. . .  
  
"It's - ah what's the point he's gone now," said the vampire. All of a sudden, he moved super fast that not even light could keep up with him.  
  
"Why must you attack me?" pleaded the man.  
  
"Well, why must you run?" said the vampire  
  
"Wait! What is wrong with this picture!" exclaimed Fleur  
  
"It's her we have to go!" Yelled the vampire evacuating the area.  
  
"What do I look like, 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer,' people, please," Fleur stopped and looked at the vampire's head.  
  
"What! Why are you looking at me like that," said the Vampire, "Girl are you feeling ok."  
  
The vampire reached out to touch Fleur. As his hand was moving closer to her. He was twitching ferociously. A fly flew in his eye. "MY GOD MY EYE, URRG!" yelled the vampire.  
  
"Boy shut the hell up! I might be dazed but I'm not unconscious do that somewhere else k bub-bye," said Fleur  
  
"Well, not to be all up in you business but what are you dazed at? Asked the vampire.  
  
"It's not what I'm dazed at but who. Ah Trunks he's so hot, why did I reject him for so many years?" said Fleur  
  
"I really don't kn-," said the vampire  
  
"Boy shut up! I'm-talking-to-my-self-here-even-though-I-don't-know- why," said Fleur in a single breathe. "Wait that was another mood swing, so I was about to kill you right, yes so let me get back to doing that now." Fleur staked the vampire and he turned into dust and his skeleton broke as he hit the ground.  
  
Fleur ran over to Trunks, "So how's it going, and my god you are the hottest thing," said Fleur, "did that just come out. Let me get my recorder 'So how's it going, and my god you are the hottest thing' guess it did."  
  
"Trice, if you don't hurry up! We're going to be late to the fashion exhibition," said Colette.  
  
"Coming hold on," said Trice, "What the hell is that behind you!"  
  
"What the hell is what? There couldn't possibly be nothing or else the alarm would've went off," replied Colette.  
  
"ALERT, ALERT, I REPAT THIS IS AN ALERT AND YOU BETTER LISTEN TO TRICE AND LOOK BEHIND YOU. DON'T BE A DUMB ASS," the alert wen off.  
  
Colette turned around only to find a giant tarantella with huge fangs leaking venom. It bounced out of the corner of the wall at Colette. Colette picked up a poll and knocked it to the ground. "Trice, hurry up and change it into something east to kill!" Exclaimed Colette.  
  
"Like what a roach," asked Trice  
  
"Hell no it'll attract more!" Screamed Colette  
  
"Fine," replied Trice while waving her hands. The giant tarantella turned into a wooden stick.  
  
"Let me go get my protective suit, and a helmet," said Colette running crazily up the stairs.  
  
Fleur ran in through the door with her heart beating fast. "Why is there a stick on the floor and a giant spider right behind me, Trice?" asked Fleur  
  
"I don't know do something!" Screamed Trice.  
  
"Okay!" Fleur dropped her purse and ran out the door.  
  
Trice waved her hands and the thing turned into a cat and she kicked it out the door. Fleur walked back in. "Alright, this is what we need to do that slut down the street borrowed my high-heels and the bitch never gave them back," said Fleur  
  
Gabrielle burst through the door; "Let's give this bitch a lesson in Fleurology!" said Gabrielle.  
  
Fleur and Colette walked down the street toward the girl's house. She came up to the door and waved her hand, and it flew back. She walked and went in the girl's closet and got her high-heels. She walked up to the girl and popped her in the face and walked out. As she past the corner and went down Rosemary St. she walked down a parallel hall covered in flowers and an outline of gold.  
  
"Gabrielle, hurry up or we're going to be late for the funeral. I feel so sorry for Julie the way she got shot.  
  
They walked up to the graveyard and took their seats. Fleur and Trice walked up to the stand to give their speeches.  
  
"Hello, everybody. We are here in memorial of a cousin that was very close to me She might have been a stuck up sluty hoe," said Fleur  
  
"And don't forget a straight up bitch," added in Trice.  
  
"Preach on girls," said Julie's mother in the front stand.  
  
"Now for our musical guess Michelle Branch," said Trice.  
  
Everyone started clapping and Michelle Branch walked up and started singing.  
  
Good bye to you Good bye to everything thing that I knew You were the one I loved the one thing that I-  
  
Michelle Branch continued singing, when suddenly Julie popped out of the coffin that held her body. "NO! I don't want this sad shit at my funeral put on the guy from the Charmed them song," she said falling back in the coffin with the coffin door shutting behind her.  
  
"Okay, where is the Love Spirit Love guy from the charmed theme!" yelled Fleur  
  
So as Love Spirit Love started to sing Julie popped out of the coffin once again. "Put the other Michelle Branch song on," she said going back into the coffin  
  
"Michelle you're needed again," said Trice.  
  
Michelle started singing once more:  
  
I wanted to be like you I wanted everything So I tried to be like you And I got swept away-ay I didn't know that it was so cold and You needed someone to show you the way So I took you hand and we figured out that When the tide comes I take you away If you want to I can save you I can take you away from here So lonely inside so busy out there And all you wan-  
  
"No get her-," said Julie cut off  
  
"-would you shut the hell up!" yelled everyone at her funeral., Then they all pulled out a gun and shot her.  
  
"Damn, I double died!" said Julie then she fell in the coffin  
  
"Thank you!" said Gabrielle.  
  
"You know I really like that movie about that girl, and that guy," said Julie popping back up out of the coffin.  
  
"My god can you die already," Fleur said then she waved her arm and Julie's head blasted off like a cork. "Thank, goodness for telekinesis,"  
  
"Well let's go over there to the mall that is just lying helplessly across the street," said Trice. She walked along a narrow, smooth pathway that took her straight to the entrance of the mall. As soon as her foot touched the beautifully tiled floor, people came in asking her what was her right shoe size now. "Damn, have I been shopping hopelessly at this mall going into every shoe store and hopelessly buying something!" Everyone nodded their heads confusingly with their eyes beaming down upon her, sparkling like flashlights. "People, People I shall buy all of your stores now, you'll be happy and get the hell out of my face.  
  
"You're what!" said a man far behind the crowd waving coupons. "We've spent our lives as these stores and you attend to buy them from us! What kind of sick bitches do you take us for," said the man  
  
"Ah, the sick and crazy ones," replied Trice while drinking a cherry milkshake. "Oh, it's out of flavor, you boy go fetch me a milkshake with a complementary chocolate on the side, be off with you!" Yelled Trice pointing to a helpless boy in the corner and who didn't have one taste in fashion. He was dressed in overalls with a pair of pull-ups on the outside, with a tacky black and yellow, stripped clip on tie on his skin. "Go slip in to something a little more excusable in public. Go ahead Mr. Vanradowsky you were saying something that really wasn't important but I was listening anyway. Wait, I wasn't so finish.  
  
"I was saying, Ms. Hoochi-mama-," began Mr. Vanradowsky.  
  
"-you son of a bitch I know you didn't boy you just jealous because you have on last year's Jell-O-stain, and you're in the exact same shirt that you, I don't know, where everyday! So when you are able to keep with your personal hygiene together and get some, 'Hair Come Back To Me,' then that's when you can say something to me okay bye! Yelled Trice telling Mr. Vanradowsky off snapping her perfectly manicured finger in a circular motion, then switching off.  
  
"GO GIRL," yelled a woman in the back of the crowd carrying a baby carrier with diamond and turquoise outlining.  
  
Trice walked far away from the other people she went to go find out what was taking the boy so long to get her a cherry milkshake with a complementary chocolate on the side. So she walked in the store, "Milkshake Supreme: You're favorite Milkshake store sense the dawn of man." As she walked in she didn't see anyone at the tables, or at the front counter. Only when she looked around it did she see dead bodies with tooth like punctures around each body. A body either had its face ripped out or contorted, or there was a possibility that the heart was ripped out severely. In a corner above her was a shadowy demon with red eyes, it took the form of water, it then formed into a spear heading right toward her. Trice turned around and waved her hand. The black demon thing then grew legs and feelers like an ant. It had a head that morphed out the area by the eyes. It then completely went in ant formation and shrunk to ant size. "Ewe, how trife. Where's the, 'Remove This Hell of An Ant Out of My Sight,' oh, here it is." Trice pulled out a yellow bottle with an ant printed on it and sprayed the ant.  
  
Whoosh, whoosh a sound was moving through the creaky old mansion that lay on top of the hill. "So we have to go in there and kill the demon thingy, why can't some one else do it I mean I was at home having a fun time until we had to come all the way on the other side of town! And for what, just to kill a demon NO you can go ahead and do it yourselves but I on the other hand will not stand for this!" said Fleur stumping her foot. A sudden splash erupted.  
  
"C'mon Fleur you're giving up already I thought you were stronger than that," said Colette with her arms crossed looking at her desperately.  
  
"And what are you talking about you the one who said to come here or you don't remember!" said Gabrielle  
  
"I know but you two never even thought of looking down now did you, no you didn't but if you did you'll completely agree with me," said Fleur. When they looked down they were standing in brown water.  
  
"My high-heels lets go," replied Gabrielle about to cry over her high-heels. A monster covered in mud and seaweed came from behind them.  
  
"Colette-I-don't-really-care-what-you-want-to-do," said Fleur talking really fast that the monster fainted from confusion and went back where he came.  
  
I-don't-care-you're-coming-now!" yelled Colette super fast that she had to drag Fleur and Gabrielle into the old mansion.  
  
Fleur, Colette, and Gabrielle were walking on the old wooden floors they triple creaked. As Fleur took one step creak, creak, creak, "Okay that's annoying every time I take a SSTTTTTEEEEPPPP!" yelled Fleur falling through the floor.  
  
"Fleur are you okay we'll go find some rope to pull you back up," replied Colette. "Why cant you form a chain and pull me up?" asked Fleur. "Girl I just got this new outfit yesterday and do you think I'm going to mess it up just to pull you up when I can go get rope. Pssshhhh some thing must of hit your head last night when you tripped over my (Gabrielle's) phone cord," said Gabrielle and Colette at the same time.  
  
"WAIT, or you could just, ahh, let's go get that rope," said Gabrielle. Fleur couldn't see anything hah, hah, hah, "What is that breathing on my neck légère," said Fleur a light lit the room when she turned around a creature or some sort was shrouded in a black robe with his face covered. "When did you get here?" said Fleur. "I've been here the whole time watching you wait for you pathetic sisters to come to your rescue," said the creature.  
  
"What come again?" said Fleur "I said-,"  
  
"Yeah that's great in all but I'm waiting on my sisters with the rope, and who are you calling pathetic. With that dusty robe you have on it looks like you never really accomplished much you're self. See I hate things that are your type, I mean think you can sneak up behind people, the next minute I bet you're going to try and pull some hypnotic trick just to capture me and use me as bait for some evil plan. But let me tell you something with your thinking the world revolves around you self. I can't believe I used in correct grammar, but as I was saying let me get ready to blow your planet right out of orbit, are you listening," said Fleur with her arms crossed walking around in circles finally finishing. When she turned around she found the creature sleep with an inflatable bed, sheets, and covers (pillows of course). "Tonnerre," a sound of thunder filled the whole mansion.  
  
"Oh I'm sorry I kinda dozed off at the first ten words. Any way enough of the chitchat it's now time for you and your sisters to experience real pain. TTFN," in that moment he was gone. " FLEUR hears that rope grab on and we'll pull you up!" yelled Colette, "Gabrielle don't get to close to the edge." "Colette I'm fine it not like I'm going to FAAAAALL!" yelled Gabrielle falling down in the hole with Fleur.  
  
I'm telling you he was like a pure manifestation of evil, what part of that cant you understand," said Fleur stomping her foot violently. She threw her silver hair in to the air and went up to her stairs. "Where are you going. To bed?" asking Gabrielle about to follow her. 


	2. Here comes the pixies

"Hey what's up everybody," Fleur's other sister Terra, walked in through the door holding a lot of shopping bags. "Where's everybody at?" Terra walked up twenty-four flights of stairs looking around. She even went into a secret passageway leading underground. When she got there, there were hundreds of vampires right by torches.  
  
"Nice of you to be able to join us!" screeched a vampire, whose teeth were shining red  
  
"Pleasure, but oops, I'm sorry you have to go." Terra said putting her hand to her mouth like she was about to blow a kiss: she blew blue dust, which went all around the vampires then exploding. Then a giant demon came around a stone pillar breathing fire. A bus burst through the wall, giant boulders flying everywhere.  
  
"Oh my god I'm so sorry," said Gabrielle walking out of the bus, a golden chalice clutched tightly within her hand.  
  
"Gabrielle, how did you get up twenty-four flights of stairs," said Terra  
  
"I don't know," replied Gabrielle starting to do her nails, and examining her face on a nearby mirror. Fleur walked in through the destroyed wall brushing her long silver hair that came to her ankles, and standing beside the mirror with Gabrielle. Afterwards Colette and Trice came in, clothes torn and hair messed up, and wild. Terra went in through another passageway leading to a room with weapons, and cakes and cookies.  
  
"Fleur, you know this is all your fault, if you never started bossing everyone around we wouldn't be jacked," said Colette shaking her head, and her hair falling back into perfect place looking neatly combed. "It's just like the time when you lost Gabrielle, when she was six."  
  
"Hey, Gabrielle take a look at this," said Fleur.  
  
Take a look at wh-," began Gabrielle as a giant raven carried her off. Fleur just looked off into the distance then fell on the ground and fainted.  
  
"Colette I'm nine-teen, and I was only eight when that happened!" yelled Fleur turning her back on Colette, "Besides Gabrielle, and I turned out okay; you and Trice were the only ones that were attacked." A stone fell from the ceiling and knocked Gabrielle in the back, her nail polish fell, and she looked at Fleur: anger was shining in her eyes.  
  
"Look at me I'm anger," said the flame in her eyes.  
  
"Okay, so I was the one left perfect, that still doesn't mean anything!" said Fleur  
  
Two zombie girls were in the doorway to the pole up to Colette's room. "Join us, the girls said holding out their dead, light hands. The girls started moving toward them; Gabrielle snapped her fingers, and an army of moles came from the floor and carried the zombies off.  
  
"Again, how did moles come from the ground?" said Terra looking at Gabrielle.  
  
"A troll could've thrown it up you never know," said Gabrielle.  
  
The five of them were walking in a graveyard, when phantoms started flying on fire, jumping down from the sky. Before one could come down, Colette sent a cryokenetic beam at the fire on which a phantom was standing on: the fire then froze sending the phantom hitting the ground. One came from behind Terra and froze her hands, her eyes turned pure red, then a door to a different dimension opened up and a beast came out, and engulfed one of the phantoms from behind. Then it closed. Trice turned invisible then all of a sudden a phantom shattered like glass and a pole started floating in mid-air. She came from behind a phantom, and knocked it in the head; afterwards becoming visible. The phantoms began to shoot beams toward Gabrielle, but she raided her hand just in time to send a piece of land to rise up and block it. She then shot a blast of fire from her hands and killed the phantoms. All of a sudden pixies began to fall from the sky.  
  
"Here comes the song!" exclaimed Fleur.  
  
We're little pixies short and stout  
  
We don't know what the fighting is all about  
That's why we're here to figure out  
When we come when we go  
No one shall know-  
  
A blast of fire came from the phantom and shot the pixies, "What the fuck! Alright bitch let's rumble," yelled the leader of the pixies (the largest one wearing a crown). They shot beams of lightning at the phantoms vanquishing them. "Okay!" yelled the head of the pixies. He came up to the girls; "We have important information for you.  
  
"Info, what kind of info?" said Colette looking at them bordely.  
  
That night Fleur was in her room watching the television when all of a sudden the picture turned into static. "Okay, this is so like the ring!" she exclaimed looking interest. Then they showed a black and white scenery with a well then a girl came out of it. Walking closer to her, Fleur layed their on her bed like she was expecting her. "Hi," said Fleur looking her up and down, "Samara."  
  
"Bitch if you don't want me here just say so," said Samara, "Anyway I'm going on evil day vacation so you'll receive my call tomorrow okay."  
  
Tomorrow. . .  
  
"I think Fleur is a total bitch," said one of the guys in the front row.  
  
"Whatever you know you want this ass," said Fleur, "But anyway go to hell!" A portal opened up from below the boy with fire coming from it, then he fell in. "Fucking ass hole."  
  
A boy to the side was looking at Fleur in shock. "You bitch, that was my best friend," he said.  
  
"Go to he-," began Fleur as the boy ran out the room.  
  
He ran in the cafeteria with and bolted the doors. Behind him was a black portal looking like a black hole in the wall then Fleur emerged from it. She went back down smiling. He eventually went home and opened a can of "Alphabet Speggetios" when he was about to eat them he read in it "Eat Here." He did as it said, and ate there, a spider jumped out of his bowl revieling another message, "Go to Hell." A portal opened up from beneath the boy and engulfed him.  
  
The boys T.V turned into static and the well came up and Samara came through it holding suit-cases. She stepped out of the T.V and handed Fleur a list of names; she then dissolved into water and evaporated.  
  
Within Trunks' house he was watching moving on his movie theater sized T.V. and when it went into the Scenery of the Ring, and a girl came levitating out of it. "This is just like the movie 'The Ring' I just watched it yesterday. When did Samara have silver hair, and actually looked hot," said Trunks. The girl lifted her head up and it was Fleur!  
  
"Remember, call me!" she said levitating back in the well. As she went it it was a door and she went in it. It was gold plated, and platinum. " I though evil people lived in caves with spider webbs."  
  
"This is where high-level evil people hang." Said a house elf then Fleur slapped him.  
  
"No talking. . . on. . . the fucking. . . job," she said. Fleur got out the list and was beginning to exam it. "Oh my god Brittany's on the list, oh well I always thought she was a lesbian, but she is one of my best friends.."  
  
Brittany came from kissing her girlfriend as the phone began to ring. "Hello Lesbian Agencies,"  
  
"WHAT THE FUCK, I mean you have seven days," Fleur began loud then starting to whisper.  
  
"Huh?" said Brittany.  
  
"You have seven days," Fleur continued to whisper.  
  
"You know I'm still not getting that," replied Brittany.  
  
"You have seven days," said Fleur beginning to get annoyed.  
  
"I'm sorry I can't comprehend," she said.  
  
"YOU DAMN RIGHT YOU CAN'T COMPREHEND. I SAID YOU HAVE SEVEN DAYS GOT DAMN IF YOU'LL JUST SHOT UP FROM TOUNGING YOU GIRLFRIEND YOU WOULD UNDERSTAND. DID YOU HEAR THAT NOW YOU LITTLE LESBO, DID YOU HEAR THAT NOW, GOD," said Fleur hanging up the phone in her face.  
  
"What was her problem?" said Brittany hanging up the phone, while behind her a giant hand came from the ceiling and snatched her lover.  
  
Brittany's T.V began to cut on by itself showing static. She went and cut it on.  
  
Fleur was sitting on top of the well and the sky was full of static. "Who asked her to turn off the television," said Fleur using a remote to turn it on and she saw Brittany's face.  
  
"What is wrong with my T.V.?" said Brittany.  
  
It went to the scene of the well. And Fleur was levitating out of it.  
  
"Is that Fleur," said Brittany.  
  
Fleur went up to the T.V and stepped out. "Don't I look like Fleur, and why aren't you dead," said Fleur looking down, "Oh! Wonder why," she put on a shirt and it had Samara's face on it and Brittany began to scream. 


End file.
